i’ve been absent for quite some time…… i’ve been spending days and nights trying to catch my breath, dreaming, memory creating, raising babes, baking……. watching the days and nights run into one another, sweating under the summer sun, counting stars until i run out of numbers, battling to keep my eyes open so i miss nothing, allowing tears to flow…. unashamed, drinking too much coffee, constantly barefoot, making hundreds of crowns out of whatever i can forage, feeling hurt and mad and settling with just that, taking new days as they come, whether they be perfect or lousy…….. life, thats what i’ve been living……….

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live life, live in the perfect, the bad, the poor, the love………accept all of it and grow………. xoxo

………it’s been awhile…….

it’s been awhile………i have been craving the need to write…….i need it……..it nourishes my being. the absence is due to life happening. life has been wonder-filled. it has been full. it has been busy. it has been one for the books.

http://www.sundaylounge.com/#/wanderlustroad/

i have been busy at being simply amazed…….

amazed at chubby, berry stained hands

the same hands busy outside, not leaving one dandelion un-touched, the same little being that inherited completely, the saying “to be one with nature”

watching the free spirit that has lived so incredibly well within both my girls. watching them explore through their little life. enjoying the songs and hymns of butterflies and archaic fairies that they so often lovingly speak of during their play time.

watching my oldest shape into such an incredible and fascinating young man. his wonder for all things knowledge, his thirst for wanting to know more and more.

watching the difference between all four is simply lovely. to watch them intertwine with life itself is rather splendid.

watching them grow into individuals is completely rad and bittersweet at the same time. they can only grow from here, no looking back, no going back. it is my mission for all of them to know that every.single.day they are loved. i believe they will.

heart

http://simply-divine-creation.tumblr.com/post/101491473085/elena-koshkina

being a mother is so many things.

holding hands.

wiping tears.

teacher of life.

frustration.

sleeplessness.

bonding.

growing.

selflessness.

warmth.

chaotic.

peace.

unity.

strength.

courage.

bravery.

pain.

adventure.

encouragement.

emotion.

passion.

…….so many more……..

i have a bond with each one, different than the next. a bond that is heavily armored. i know whose footsteps belong to who. i know the difference in cries, whether it be hurt feelings or injury. i know their quirky habits. i know their wonderful birthmarks. their toes. their smiles. the depth in their very eyes.

heart

http://thepureskin.tumblr.com/post/109320999993/xxx-mcmxciv-jah-feel-baby-on-the-baby

i was meant to be a mother. God knew all along, obviously, even when i questioned it. silly me.

h e a r t

(Pinterest)

i hope to be back sooner to post a bit more. i have some more grand things i would love to share.

xoxo